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So this month marks a year since I left Institutional Church.

Tuesday, November 29, 2005. Is this too much to ask from an uncaring world full of selfserving do gooders that rarely do good? Iam afraid it is. It never hurts to lose what one doesnt have. It never hurts if you never fail at trying something new. It never hurts to have your heart broken if you never give it to another to handle. It never hurts to try again and again and again, if you never try in the first place. It hurts to never know what if? .

That man is truly good who knows his own dark places.

As if we plugged the hole. I have figured it out. Losing touch can be hard. Of all we have to lose. Leaves us to take it for granted. Some sort of abstract curiousity. I feel a weight lifted. The scent of oranges lingers. The pup is looking up at me. I see a smile in his eyes. He is content, as I am. As if by no will of my own.